Am I the only one who stole Halloween candy (a lot) from the children in my life? When do you get old enough to have some self control? Shouldn’t that come with age? I mean literally, popping those bitches one right after the other. It’s so not okay and frankly, it’s kind of embarrassing.  After a couple of days of Netflix and bingin’ I finally had had enough, I’ve got to get these sugary bastards out of my house. Obvi, I cannot be trusted.

I had some sugar cookie dough in the freezer leftover from another moment of weakness. This is how bad it’s getting, I don’t even like cookies but that sure didn’t stop me from whipping up a batch (this recipe) unnecessarily one night (sugar addiction I’m coming for you in 2016!). While I waited for the dough to defrost, I rounded up the chocolate troops from each of the hiding places I had set up throughout the house:  each of the three desks in the house, in my purse just in case my blood sugar dropped while out and about, and the freezer where a ho-hum snickers turns into a real special moment. I unwrapped and chopped Butterfingers, Mars Bars, Almond Joys, Reeses Peanut Butter Cups and Snickers with a vengeance. That’s no exaggeration. We really have a love/ hate relationship. Like I said, it’s embarrassing.

It was all over before I knew it. All I did was take those tempting chunks and smash them into the dough, which I then placed victoriously on a parchment lined cookie sheet. I baked those bitches for 10 minutes at 375 degrees and sayonara caramel nougat, hasta creamy peanut butter, hello husband’s co-workers who keep saying he needs to bring in some food for the office. Enjoy that shit!

If you too are suffering from halloween candy leftovers, you’re not alone. There’s help out there:

Addiction is personal, if yours is not of the chocolate variety give these a try: Skittle Meringues

When one addiction (coffee) meets another: Candy Corn Biscotti 

When you just don’t want to fight it anymore: Halloween Candy Brownies

Now if I could only figure out what the hell to do with all these damn Nerds — my dentist is going to be pissed.